Application 2: God ordains means as well as ends. God is the Author. This is his story. We are his characters. Therefore, Be a faithful character in God’s story.* Taken from a sermon by Joe Rigney defending the purpose of prayer in a world exhaustively pre-determined by eternal divine decree [you can find a link [...]
Filed under: determinism, prayer, predestination, satire, secret decrees | 5 Comments »
Case 1 The situation was grim for Police Chief, Captain Everett Justus. The most powerful and cunning crime boss in all the city, Moriarty Norton, had constantly evaded capture, and had recently stepped up his criminal activities. This would be bad enough normally, but a dispatch with potentially worse news had come into the office. [...]
Filed under: determinism, foreknowledge, free will, Posts written by JC Thibodaux, satire, secret decrees | 9 Comments »
That’s right, I have converted. It finally got to me. My Arminianism finally led to the inevitable Open Theist conclusion. I just don’t think that God can foreknow future free will choices if they are truly free. Sorry. But! I have decided to also hold to God’s exhaustive foreknowledge of all future choices and events, [...]
Filed under: determinism, foreknowledge, free will, Open Theism, satire | 125 Comments »
Here are a few YouTube cartoon videos taking a humorous stab at witnessing from the Arminian or Calvinist perspective. The Calvinist one was done first and the Arminian ones were done in response. Of course, I think the Arminian ones are better and more accurate. I also found the Calvinist one a little annoying because of [...]
Filed under: atonement, determinism, monergism, predestination, satire | 7 Comments »
Consitent Calvinism FAQ (Satire)
Filed under: apostasy, atonement, Calvinism, eternal security, perseverance, prayer, predestination, satire, secret decrees | Leave a Comment »
“Jesus loves the little children… All the children of the world… Red and yellow, black and white… They are precious in His sight… Jesus loves the little children of the world” Herman: Well, that song was quite obviously written by an Arminian Calvin: Why do you say that? Herman: Well, the song says that Jesus [...]
Filed under: atonement, satire | 16 Comments »
It is pointless to debate an issue if your terms are not properly defined. Pizzaman has done us all a great service by providing us with the Calvinist Dictionary. Be sure to check it out.
Filed under: satire | 5 Comments »
And the LORD said unto Moses, “Make thee a fiery serpent, and set it upon a pole: and it shall come to pass, that every one that is bitten, when he looketh upon it, shall live. And Moses made a serpent of brass, and put it upon a pole, and it came to pass, that [...]
Filed under: Posts written by JC Thibodaux, satire | 43 Comments »
I have recently been accused of being an inconsistent Arminian because I reject Open Theism. I find it interesting that Calvinists are so concerned with consistency seeing as how they both affirm that God causes all things and is yet somehow not the author of sin. I admit that I love consistency. I reject Calvinism [...]
Filed under: determinism, free will, Open Theism, satire | 12 Comments »
The following link is satire. It is all in good fun and not intended to be insulting to anyone. Like they often said in the juvenile shelters I used to work in, “If it don’t apply, let it fly.” On the flip side it may help some of our Calvinist friends take an honest look [...]
Filed under: satire | 1 Comment »
